lost virginity

it seems as though during the summer is when people, especially young folks lose their virginity the most... don't know what it is but it happens. the summer i lost my virginity was the summer i was going from the ninth grade to the tenth grade. i remember it was about six days before my fifteenth birthday, heres my story:

he and i have known each other for most of our lives,we grew up together when we first met i was five and he was ten (yes we known each other that long). i started to become attracted to him when i was about eleven (hormones started acting up, period was about to start) but i never really said or did anything about it. i remember my mom used to tell me to stay away from him (we lived three doors down from one another) because he was too old and a trouble maker. when i got older around thirteen, fourteen it got worst. my balls grew bigger and he was a lot more blatant with his approach towards me.  he always watched me from his window, he would come to my school after the day was over and walk back or take the bus with me back home, bought me things here and there, etc. at that time it was just talking and harmless flirting, nothing major. he was in high school and i was still in junior high. he started dating this girl named debora... she hated me and i never knew why but thinking back i guess it was because she knew that i was after her boyfriend (well at the time i didnt know i was after him just liked him)
fast forward to a year and some months later... it was the summer of 2003 and i was getting ready to head to the 10th grade. he and i had started dating but it was nothing too serious at least for me because i was no fool i knew he was talking to other females as i other guys, we were in two different age groups. by the time august came around we had been dating for three maybe four months... for some reason that summer the tension between he and i was high.. and i was hot.... the day i lost my virginity was six days before my fifteenth birthday. i still remember it like it was yesterday. anyway we had been flirting heavy the entire week. spending more time at his house than usual, he taking me different places, going out together away from the neighborhood more than we usually do. not even taking age into consideration like we did before.. we really wasn't even think about the age difference at this point. the day before i lost my virginity for some reason i was super A. i went to his house and kind of just through myself on him. i couldn't even believe that i came at him like that, i mean i never kissed anyone until that day and i was surprised with myself. anyway after about an hour of foundling, kissing,and alot of  touching i jumped up and i went home. the next day came my mom had left for work around seven like she usually do, i let her out gave her a kiss and went back to bed. i am deep in my sleep and around 11 oclock i hear a knock out my door. my bedroom window faced the front of apt complex so i can see whoever was at my door. i peaked through my blinds and there he was. in my head i am like oh sh*t but i got up fixed my hair real quick and opened the door. he came up with some b.s excuse that he wanted to borrow a pen and phonebook. i gave it to him and went back to bed. an hour later he comes back admits that it was phony and that he wanted to see me. so i let him in, we sitting there talking and chilling and out of nowhere he starts kissing me, the young me done forgot what we did the day before and i couldnt remember how to kiss. he is tugging at my clothes and i was like whoa back up. no sooner had i said that i was just like you might as well go for it you been eyeing this guy for years so i did... he was gentle but i never expected losing my virginity would feel like that. it was so much pain and so much blood. i remember he had to keep bringing me back to him and he had to keep grabbing me because i kept running off the bed, at one point i was half way off the bed, my entire top half of my body was hanging off. i don't even think we had sex for ten minutes. i jumped up out of the bed walked really slowly to the bathroom and took a long hot shower. 

the day i lost my virginity was one of the worst days ever... never again
in all honesty i wish i never would of had sex that day at that time, but i would never change who i had sex with